Downsizing is easier when the stuff that is taking up a lot of space is not valuable or precious. Sure in the eyes of the family and your parents, any furniture, knick knacks, Christmas ornaments and egg beaters you've seen day in and day out are the equivalent of priceless heirlooms.
In a 6 week process in which we moved a ton (sometimes known as a shitload) of my parents' belongings to my house, we have learned a few things I'd like to share for other kids faced with relocating their parents ... especially if you are funding the move and your elderly parents don't have money.
You have a few options for downsizing:
Option 1) In a hurry? Don't downsize. Move it all then decide later.
The pros: You won't inadvertently give away anything that really is precious to the family.
You spend less time culling through everything now. There are downsizing consultants who charge a lot, maybe $65 per hour or more (sometimes called movers !). If your parent is a hoarder he or she will invariably take an hour per item. Seriously. That money can add upThe definition of money down the drain? Spending $65 per hour to get RID of stuff. See the irony?
Spending money to move it and waiting for that "inevitable" day is probably more cost effective if you have storage space.
Weigh the costs of:
- Moving
- Storing
- Paying someone to help sort
Option 2) Take an aggressive approach to throwing stuff out and giving things away.
The con: Your mom or dad might go downright crazy with grief and anger. Do you want your parent's mind to fail or get worse over a few things?
I realize dealing with rooms and rooms of crap can be completey overwhelming. We've just gone through the process of unveiling boxes and boxes and piles and piles of clothes, papers, etc. Given the cost of elder care and assisted living, the cost of maintaining our mother's sanity and dignity seemed far less than the cost of storing the things she loves. Sure it's painful and embarrassing but a low cost to pay.More thoughts to come later. The drama continues...
What are you going through?
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